Friend To The End

I have been blessed in my life to have many friends. My friends come in a wide variety and assortment of people from many different walks of life. I have friends who are very conservative, along with friends who have an extremely liberal viewpoint. I have friends from many different religious and spiritual paths including Christians, Jews and Pagans. Many of my friends do not claim any religious affiliation and are Agnostic or Athiest. Race doesn't matter to me and many of my friends are black. I am friends with singles, married couples, and gays and lesbians. Some of my friends are ordained ministers, while others enjoy the party life and getting drunk on the weekend.



Different friends provide a unique level of friendship. Some friends are great conversationalists and stimulate my mind with deep and probing questions on life and matters of faith. Other friends are just plain fun to hang around and keep me laughing and enjoying myself completely. Then there are those who are there for me when I really need them. I may not hear from them that often, but when a tragedy comes, like the recent loss of my Mom, those friends are right there to lift me up.

When I make a friend, I like to keep the friendship alive for life. I do my best to remember their birthday every year and special events in their life. Even when they move on I keep in touch. That's just the way I am. A friend to the end.



I have friends that I have known since I was a child who I still keep in touch with. I have friends scattered all over the United States and a good friend who lives in Ireland.

I have recently made a new bunch of friends at work and we have had a great time together including a couple of times out at a local casino for karaoke.



I love the word "Hello". It's always fun and exciting to meet a new friend and to get to know that person. On the other hand, the word "Goodbye" is very painful for me. I have had to say this word more times than I care to count to very close friends as either they or I had to move on to another place. There is a part of me that is hesitant to develope new friendships as I realize that the goodbye will eventually come. But the good times that we have together makes it worth it.

I am a person who cares deeply. I love my family, although they don't often hear me say it. Likewise, I love all of my friends, even though I enjoy picking on many of them and giving them a hard time.

I recently read a quote that I found to be very true: "Each friend represents a world in us, a world not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born."

I used to listen to a song by Contemporary Christian artist Wayne Watson "A Season In Your Path" and it speaks about friends who are there at specific times in your life, just when you need them, and then they move on.


Most of the friends that I have made as an adult were at the places I was employed. I invariably get them involved in dress up days and projects for Halloween and have enjoyed numerous occasions of encouraging friends to get dressed up for different events.

To those of you who are friends from my past, I still think about you from time to time. I do my best to keep in touch, even though we are separated by miles and time. To my friends I have made locally, I value your friendship and enjoy hearing from you and getting together. And to my new friends, I am excited about having had the opportunity to meet you and to get to know you better.



I can't imagine a life without friends. I can go online at any time, day or night, and there will almost always be somebody available who I can chat with if I need to. I am thankful for you all and wish you the best!

Creative Streak

I get bored very easily. In fact, I am always on the move, looking for new and exciting experiences. I crave adventure, and if my life gets stuck in a routine I quickly become depressed and lethargic. If I sit still for more than a few minutes, I begin to drift off to sleep.

I have often wondered if I have ADD but have just never been diagnosed. I spend a lot of time in my head, probably much more than I should, but this is just how I have learned to cope with life. I will often be in a conversation with a family member or friend when my mind begins to wander. Before I realize it, I am completely oblivious to what is being said. I'm not purposely trying to be rude, and it's not that I don't care about the other person and what they have to say. My mind just won't shut down. That's just how it works.

I feel the most fulfilled when I am in the process of creating something. I believe that creation is a gift, a drive within each of us, and there is nothing quite like seeing a project come to fruition.

I have quite a vivid imagination and at times it has led me into a fair amount of trouble. I just don't see the world like other people do. What may seem foolishness and fantasy may be reality to me. I don't draw the lines in the sand in the same spot as normal folks. No, I like to push the boundary a little.

Sometimes I wonder if it's not for attention, cravings from my childhood that were sometimes ignored as my parents were very busy with the church.

I have developed a talent for makeup, costumes, and acting. My favorite genre is horror and I always try to outdo myself, creating the most outlandish and freakish characters that I can imagine. My favorite horror character is Legault the Vampire. I have never lost a costume contest as this character. Indeed, I sometimes feel that he is my dark side, allowed to take shape and form when I put on the makeup and the cloak of darkness. I have even been told that my eyes appear to change color when I portray this character.

When my two oldest boys were younger, many weekends were spent filming crazy videos. The family got so tired of it all that I finally had to put an end to it. I was involved with several projects with friends including haunted houses, skits and plays while living in Eastern Kentucky.

I recently spent some time with my younger son, Alex, and we created a video using my Krypt Kiddies dolls. Alex did an amazing job putting the film together, working with the music and individual scenes. He has quite a talent for that sort of thing. We named our short film "Babies From Hell".



I was never into sports or cars, not like normal little boys. No,I could usually be found reading comic books or novels about Tarzan or Conan the Barbarian. As a teenager I was introduced to the role playing game Dungeons & Dragons. I still enjoy all of these hobbies, even as an adult.

So if you are ever speaking to me and you can tell that my mind is a million miles away, please realize that I am nor purposely being rude. My mind is simply formulating it's next adventure. Gently get my attention, bring me back to reality, and I'll do my best to listen.

You Gotta Have Faith

From as far back as I can remember I was taught that there was a higher power that created the universe and was ultimately in control of eternity. As a preacher's kid being raised in a Conservative Christian environment, that Creator didn't always seem very nice to me, especially when I read for myself those horror stories in the Old Testament of the unfortunate souls who stepped out of line. Although I was uncomfortable with some of the stories, I still believed, without question, that there was a God.

I was recently faced with an interesting and thought provoking question: Why do people of faith believe what they do? Last week I had the opportunity, on two separate occasions, to have lunch with a different friend. In both instances, the conversation led to matters of faith and belief. Also in both instances, the friend that I had lunch with told me that he was Agnostic.

I have learned to listen with respect to the beliefs shared by others, even when I don't agree with everything that they have to say. Sometimes by staying silent and just listening, I have found great wisdom in the words of others. In the past I would have argued for the case of the existence of God, using my Bible to back me up. Those days are over, as I have since become much more respectful of the beliefs held by others. I have also discovered that you can't have two people in the same room without there being a disagreement of some sort when it comes to such matters, even if they follow the same religion.

So these conversations with my friends led me to do some deep thinking of my own. Why is it that I hold on to my own personal beliefs? Do I believe in a higher power because that is what I was taught to believe as a child? Do I believe because some holy book tells me that if I don't I will burn in Hell forever? The answer to both of those questions is surprisingly NO.



As I have mentioned in previous blogs, I was once a dedicated Christian and very much involved with the church. After the events that took place in Kentucky several years ago, I went through my own Dark Night of the Soul where I came painfully face to face with questions about who I was, what I believed, and why. For a short time I was Agnostic. I just could not bring myself to believe in a God who would allow such a horrible thing to happen to myself and my family. It was a dark and miserable time in my life.

When I moved back to California, I realized that my days as a church going man were over. And yet I felt that there was something missing in my life. There was a great void that faith had once filled. At this time I was open to new beliefs and new ways of seeing the world. I wanted to see for myself what those of other faiths believed, how they worshipped, and most importantly, was it real?

I attended a Jewish Sabbat of Song and very much enjoyed the music and the way that they freely worshipped. I attended a class at Moonrise Herbs on Shamanism and listened to a woman who had been on this path for many years, studying in Japan and taking much of the wisdom she found there into her own path. I took part in a Druid ritual in a Redwood Grove and felt very much at home as the Divine was called upon in Nature. I took my ball python, Greta, with me to the Blessing of the Beasts at our local Unitarian Universalist Fellowship and was pleased to find that people were not afraid of her, but asked questions and wanted to pet her. I was allowed to hold her during the entire service inside of the fellowship hall. I went to a Zen meditation center and sat on a mat to meditate, surrounded by others doing the same. I lasted for about fifteen minutes and had to get up and leave.

In every case I was confronted with people who held different views on God and religion. But in every case I found that these people all had one thing in common. They had Faith. They all believed in something larger than themselves. This was very comforting and reassuring to me.

But back to my original question: What is it in the life of a person of faith that causes them to believe? Why are the beliefs of a religious or spiritual person different from an Agnostic or Athiest?

The answer dawned on me last week as I thought about the conversations I had with my friends over lunch. There is one major difference between the Agnostic and the person of faith. The answer is Experience.



I no longer believe in a Hell reserved for people who don't believe a certain way, and this includes Agnostics and Athiests. I believe that we are all given the freedom to discover, without fear, lifes important questions on our own. But I also believe that there is something inside of us, in some barely perceptible, that longs for something more. We are all looking for meaning and purpose in life, and part of this need, in my own belief, is only met by having an experience with the Divine.

I believe what I do, not because it's what's expected of me. I don't even follow the beliefs of the prominent religions, finding comfort in a spirituality that is Nature based in its approach. But I have had experiences in my life that can only be explained as being Divine in origin.

Science says that there is no proof for the existence of God, so He or She cannot exist. But Science cannot disprove personal experience. And that is what the person of faith clings to and cherishes. It may seem foolish to those who do not believe, but to the believer, those experiences make all of the difference in life.

For me personally, at certain times in my life, I have encountered the most incredible, unconditional love I have ever experienced. At times it is almost palpable, like I can reach out and touch it. I am almost always alone, and usually in Nature, when I have experienced this. There have been times when I was awakened from sleep to be completely enveloped by this Divine love, the full moon shining brightly on my face through the window. At other times I have felt empowered or protected, and have found the strength, not originating within myself, to move forward. I have tried, in vain, to find a love like this in human relationships, but always end up disappointed and disillusioned. There have been too many times to count, the little synchronicities, where everything just seems to fall into place, like there is a force that is guiding me along.

Some find God in their Holy Scriptures, others in hymns and songs. Some hear a calling, sometimes audible, upon their lives. Some find a connection to something larger than themselves during meditation or prayer. Some people, myself included, find the Divine in Nature and feel a deep connection there. The approaches may be different, but the end result is the same: we are all seeking to fill that space inside that can only be filled by one thing. You can call it God, Goddess, Great Spirit, the Force, the name really doesn't matter.


I personally look to Nature for questions about Creation. I don't know exactly how it all came about, but I can see the work of an intelligent mind behind the Universe. Think about it for a moment. Everything moves in a circle. The moon revolves around the Earth. The Earth revolves around the sun. Our solar system has its own rotation. Even within ourselves, as science has proven, the atoms and molecules move in a similar pattern. Then we have the seasons. Winter turns to Spring, Spring turns to Summer, Summer turns to Autumn, and then we are back to Winter again. Everything has an order. Even in the animal and plant kingdom, there is an order, a progression from birth to life and eventually death, and the circle continues. Something has set this all into place. I don't believe for a second that all of this is just some big coincidence.

So I continue to hold to my own beliefs, finding comfort and peace in my connection through Nature. For those of you who have found the Divine, no matter what religion or spiritual path you choose to follow, I wish you well on your journey. To those of you who do not believe, for whatever reason, that's fine as well. But one of these days, you may be faced with an experience that changes your mind. Something to think about.

In Memory of Trees

I love trees! In fact, I would even go so far as to say that some of my best friends are trees. Trees don't judge you by how you look, by the color of your skin, or by what religion you follow. Trees are patient and endearing. Indeed, we humans can learn a lot from trees, if we will just slow down and take the time to truly listen. As a kid I loved to spend my time outdoors in the woods and could often be found in the company of trees.

I have recently started reading a book entitled "Whispers In The Woods". The author encourages her readers to think back upon all the places that they have lived. In each of these places, there will be at least one or two trees that stand out. When you think about these special trees, memories will begin to flood your mind. I tried it and the author is absolutely right!

Some of my earliest memories with trees were in the woods back behind our home where I grew up in Klamath, CA. My brother and sister and I would spend hours in the woods, climbing trees, making forts, and splashing in the creek. There was one particular tree that was growing from a small island in the middle of the creek. The tree grew at such a slant that we could walk up the trunk. I remember another time when I had just visited a barber and he cut my hair too short. I was just a little tyke then and very self concious about my haircut. I was at church on Sunday morning and there was a teenage girl there who began to tease me about my hair. I was so upset that I ran away and went straight out into the woods. There was a group of trees that we called the Rainbow Trees. They were bowed like rainbows and covered in thick green moss. I climbed up into the branches of the trees and cried my eyes out over being made fun of. I will never forget that experience and feeling safe in the sheltering branches of those trees.

Years ago when we were living in Eastern Kentucky, we were renting a house from an older couple that was down an old road. There was an enormous Willow Tree in our front yard and we would often see a woodpecker there pecking away. One year the locusts came and the tree, as well as all of the trees surrounding the area, were filled with locusts. The sound that they made was deafening. I also remember summer nights when the fireflies would flicker and dance in the Willow Tree, giving it the appearance of something out of Fairyland.

More recently when we moved back to California we rented a home from my wife's cousin and lived there for several years. There was a Redwood Tree in the back yard and the kids liked to climb up near the top from where they could see the ocean. I enjoyed laying out in the yard and reading under the shade of the tree. I spent many evenings under the tree enjoying the view of the full moon to the east. This special tree was a resting place for Blue Jays, Mourning Doves, Ravens, and many other birds. In the yard were also a pair of apple trees and three plum trees. We would gather the fruit every fall and have enough to last for months.

I enjoy hiking at Hiller Park and have come across several interesting trees there. One of my favorites is an enormous Sitka Spruce. It is growing on a hill overlooking the Mad River. Once when I was hiking alone out in the woods I came across an amazing sight. Imagine my surprise when I saw a tree with a face! I took a closer look and discovered that somebody had attached eyes, nose and a mouth to the tree. It stayed that way for months until some hoodlum tore the face off of the tree. I still enjoy visiting the tree whenever I am in the area. There are many special trees in the park and I try to get away there whenever I can.

One of my greatest pleasures is camping among the Redwoods. Last summer I went on a camping trip with some friends down at Avenue of the Giants. One of the girls took several of us to see a rare Albino Redwood Tree. I was in awe of this beautiful tree and felt humbled in her presence. There are only a few of these trees in the world, a handful of them being in the Avenue of the Giants area. Months later I took the family on a picnic and afterwards introduced them to the Albino Redwood.


We humans have a symbiotic relationship with trees. Without the oxygen that they produce, we would perish. Likewise, they require the carbon monoxide that we breathe out to survive.

When I see a tree I do not see a soulless "thing". I see a living, breathing creature, deserving of respect. I believe that they have much to tell us. But we have to slow down to listen to what they have to say. Even as an adult, I still find comfort in the branches of a tree.

So I challenge you. Think back to the places you have lived during your life. Does a particular tree stand out in your mind? Meditate on that special tree and allow the cherised memories to return.