The War on Christmas

It's finally over! The gifts are unwrapped, the tree is bare and sitting outside against the fence (yes, we took it down yesterday), and things are getting back to normal. For me, when Christmas is over... IT'S OVER!

I enjoyed myself this year. It started out with me being quite depressed and stressed at work. By the time the holiday came around I was excited and looking forward to it. Ryan sent us a nice box of gifts and we all had fun opening those. As always I ate too much and felt sluggish the rest of the day.

I am always interested to read the latest on the so called "War on Christmas". It seems like there was quite a bit of foolishness coming from both sides this year.

I first read about an advertisement by The Gap where they cheered "Go Christmas! Go Hannukah! Go Kwanzaa!". Well, the American Family Association got their panties in a bunch and said that it was disrespectful to Christians and called for a boycott on The Gap. I watched the commercial myself and saw that it was completely harmless. But the "Bullies for Jesus", as I call these kinds of folks, were upset because their Holiday was not the prominent one featured in the ad.

On the other hand, here in my own state of California, it seems that a man who is an Athiest made a complaint about stars and angels on a Christmas tree located on government property. He complained that the stars and angels were religious symbols and had no business being endorsed by the government. Of course they caved in to his whining and all those ornaments were removed. If you want to get technical, the Christmas Tree itself was originally a Pagan tradition, so maybe they should just take the whole tree down!

So here is where I stand on all of this... Everybody grow up and get along! To the "Bullies for Jesus" Christmas is not the only holiday celebrated in December. Jews celebrate Hanukkah, Pagans celebrate the Winter Solstice, African Americans celebrate Kwanzaa, and Muslims celebrate Ashura. Besides these, there are other, lesser known holidays. In fact, I believe that just about every day in the month of December is a holiday to somebody, somewhere. So get over it when the clerk at the store says "Happy Holidays". They are just trying to be inclusive and not assume that everybody who comes into the store is a Christian who celebrates Christmas. Imagine, for a moment, if Americans were predominately Jewish and all you ever heard was "Happy Hannukah"? How would these same folks feel if everybody just assumed that they were Jewish and didn't take their own faith into account? I don't see it as trying to take Christ out of Christmas, as many would claim, I see it as wishing everyone an enjoyable holiday season, regardless of their religion, or lack thereof.

Actually, Christmas is the most recent December holiday, with the exception of Kwanzaa which was first celebrated in 1966. And for those of you who didn't know, there was a baby born in ages past on December 25. He was worshipped by many and was believed to bring light to the world. I'm not talking about Jesus. No, he was Horus, son of the Egyptian deities Isis and Osiris. The Greek Dionysus was said to have been born on December 25, as well as several other solar deities. The Winter Solstice has been celebrated since the dawn of time, many Pagans seeing this day as the rebirth of the Sun or Son. So sorry guys, you can't claim this season as only belonging to you. Guess you will just have to learn how to share. And isn't that what Jesus taught anyway?

And then we have Mr. Athiest who is offended by stars and angels on the tree. Get a life! Go give food to the poor or something! I mean, how much of a Scrooge can somebody be? These symbols are as old as time, and loved by many people from many different walks of life. You don't have to be religious to enjoy stars or angels.

In a perfect world, we would see a manger scene, honoring the Christ Child. Next to that would be a Menorah all lit up, and a Wiccan Pentacle on top of the tree. There would be songs from all different traditions, and people would share the winter holidays together, celebrating their differences, instead of being divided and getting all in a tizzy because their specific holiday is not given priority. In a perfect world, we would even let Mr. Athiest put his "I Don't Believe In Anything" ornament on the tree and drink a toast to his health as well.

But we don't live in a perfect world, do we? I personally don't know any Hanukkah songs. I don't even know what, if any, religion my neighbor follows. As Americans we have learned to keep to ourselves, our own traditions, our own beliefs. But in a perfect world...

So I just want to take this opportunity to wish all of my Christian friends, as well as secular friends who still choose to celebrate, Merry Christmas! To my Jewish friends a Happy Hanukkah! To my Pagan friends a Blessed Yule! To my.... Oh, to heck with it! Happy Holidays! There, I believe that covers everybody!

Ghosts of Christmas Past

I have been under a great deal of stress for the past several weeks. We have recently switched over to a new computer system at work and there have been all sorts of problems and frustrations. As a result, I have been waking up early in the morning and finding myself unable to go back to sleep, problems from my job plaguing my mind.

I found myself awake at 4am the other morning and could not for the life of me go back to sleep. I kept going over and over in my mind about all of the many problems that I would have to deal with in just a few short hours. I only had about an hour and a half before I had to get up and around and desperately needed more sleep.

In the past I have practiced visualization techniques to help me to deal with stress and to rest. I decided to take conrol of the situation and not let my stress get the best of me. I imagined myself standing before a door adorned by a wreath with evergreen and holly. As I opened the door, I walked into a cozy room with a blazing fire and a Christmas tree with presents piled beneath. There was a nice armchair sitting before the fire and I decided to take a rest there. A little elf dressed in green and red handed me a steaming mug of hot coco and I began to wind down. As I sipped the coco, the little elf handed me a large book, thick with many pages. As I opened the book, I realized that this book contained all of the memories from every Christmas that I had ever had. Joy filled my soul as I was flooded with images, music and happy faces from the past.

I remembered Christmas as a child, how me and my brother and sister would be so excited on Christmas morning that we would get up before the crack of dawn and beg our parents to let us open our gifts. I remembered the Christmas plays and the carols we would sing at church. I smiled as visions of my first Christmas with Patti came to mind. We were poor, but we were happy together, just the two of us in our little cottage in Eureka.

I was taken back to visit familiar faces, long gone, but still alive in my memories.
I remembered one Christmas at Grandmother Robert's house, and all of the years where we went to see Grandmother and Gramps in Central City. I could still taste Grandmother's sweet potato casserole in orange cups. After visiting Gramps and Grandmother we would drive to Owensboro to visit Mamaw Boyd up in her apartment at the Roosevelt House. She didn't have much money, but she always fed us well and we would all sit around the living room telling stories.

I remembered the strange event one cold Christmas Eve as we left Owensboro and my sister Janet and I heard the distant sound of sleigh bells. We looked up in the sky and saw a strange sight, something neither of us could explain. I was a teenager, way past the age of believing in Santa Clause, yet that experience made me wonder...

As I turned the pages of the book I came to more recent years, Christmas with my own children. I remembered how excited they use to be and the twinkle in their eyes as they opened their gifts on Christmas morning. I remembered the many times we spent Christmas Eve at Mom and Dad's house in Pikeville, Ky. Mom would always have a big feast prepared and there would be gifts under the tree for everyone. Dad would read the Christmas story from the Bible and we would all sit around laughing and enjoying each other's company.

I remembered fondly my ferrets Scamp and Skittles. Skittles passed away on Thanksgiving Day 2008 and Scamp just a few months later in April 2009. Skittles would always climb under the tree and steal the ornaments. He would hide them and we would find them, sometimes months later, under the couch or the entertainment center.

I couldn't help but smile as all the happy memories flooded my mind. A feeling of peace drifted over me as I drifted back to sleep. Just a short time later I woke up, not quite so stressed and ready to face another day.

Last night we took the kids to Old Town Coffee & Chocolates for an evening of storytelling with the ghostly Carpathian and company. We sipped hot coco as we listened to ghost stories of Christmas and Hanukkah. There were silly songs and old carols played by Scatter the Mud, a local Celtic band. The room was very crowded and Patti and I had to stand the entire time, but we enjoyed ourselves.

As Carpathian reminded us, there weren't always TVs and computers to keep us entertained during the holidays. Telling ghost stories on Christmas Eve is a tradition that was very much alive in times past. The families would gather around the fireplace and enjoy each other's company, telling tales as they kept warm inside from the chill of winter outside.

Christmas is the season of Ghosts. I was visited by mine the other morning and feel blessed by all the happy memories that they brought to me.

Holiday Traditions

I am beginning to get more into the spirit of the holidays. Yesterday Patti and I went to pick out our tree. I always like to have a live tree in the house for Christmas. For the past few years we have had Douglas Firs but there's always a big mess afterwards with the needles. This year we decided on a Noble Fir and will see how that works out.

When Patti and I were married back in 1986, we began a tradition that has continued up to the current year. We purchased a special ornament, back then it was two bears in a hot air balloon with the message "Our First Christmas" engraved on a little heart. Since 1986, we have purchased one special ornament for ourselves, as well as one ornament for each of our three boys. We have a nice collection of assorted ornaments from all over the country.

Last night I had Matthew and Alex help me dig out the Christmas boxes and we began to sort things out. I found some silly elf hats with bells attached and tried one on. Alex got into the spirit as well and tried on one of the hats. I set out our little moving Angel that I named Gloria years ago. I also set out my little Christmas Elf that I found at a thrift store last year, much to the displeasure of my wife and boys.

Hanging the ornaments on the tree brought back a lot of memories. Many of them were purchased when we lived in Pike County, Ky from 1989 through 2003. We have one memorial ornament from the year the Twin Towers fell, another from our trip to Niagara Falls in Canada. There were Baby's First Christmas ornaments and several from places we have visited over the years like Christus Gardens and Dollywood in the Smoky Mountains of TN.

Of course, decorating the tree without holiday music would never do. Patti didn't want to hear any of the happy traditional stuff and I completely agreed. I put on Sting's new albumn "If On A Winter's Night" and after that Nox Arcana's "Winter's Knight". The latter happens to be my favorite Winter CD. With the sounds of bells, deep pipe organs and ghostly choirs, nothing gets me in the mood for the holidays more than this dark yet enchanting music.

With the tree up, we moved on to the next task... wrapping presents! This took much longer than we expected and by the time we were finished our backs were hurting, but we had lots of packages with colored paper to go under the tree.

I enjoy the traditions and rituals that we have followed over the years. Even when our oldest son, Ryan, left the nest to join the Army, we still continued to purchase a special ornament for him. By the time he, and each of our boys, is ready to get a place of his own, he will already have a large collection of ornaments for his tree. And each year, as long as we are alive, the boys will get a special ornament from Mom and Dad.

Yuletide Blues

I have been considering starting a blog for some time now. I have a blog on Myspace and a couple of other sites, but wanted to reach out to a larger community. So here I am with my first blog and a topic that has been on my mind for a couple of weeks.

The Holiday Season is upon us! I swear this year they were playing Christmas music in the stores just a few days after Halloween. I have to confess that this time of year has been very depressing for me for several years. I try not to be a Scrooge, but sometimes the happy music, the pushy shoppers, and the crowded stores are just a little too much for me.

It never fails, this time of year always seems to hit me hard financially. I have a wife and three boys, one of them grown and away in the US Army. Every year I try to start saving money early so that they can have a decent Christmas. But unexpected expenses always seem to pop up and knock me down a peg.

This year my mother was diagnosed with cancer on our wedding anniversary. I flew out to Kentucky to be with her and held her hand when she died, and my wife and kids flew out in time for the funeral. Friends and family were very generous and helped us out with the airfare, but we still ended up in quite a bit of debt over the trip. Then when I returned home my van had some problems from sitting idle for two weeks and I had to put $600 into getting it fixed. "That's life!" as Mom would always say.

I was raised to believe not to put too much stock in the commerciality of Christmas, that it wasn't about presents and Santas Claus and building snowmen. I do try to honor the spiritual side of the season and find strength and hope in the traditions and ancient stories of Peace on Earth Good Will to Men. But sometimes the more cynical side of me says "Peace on Earth? Yeah right!" Wars, suicide bombers, road rage, cruelty to animals... and the list goes on. People can't even get along with their own families, much less the rest of the world.

Television and advertising bombard us with images of beautiful and happy rich people adorned with every expensive gift that they could possibly imagine. With their perfect bodies and worry free lives, they live in mansions with elaborate holiday decorations, cozy fireplaces, and tables adorned with the most elegant and mouth watering dishes that money can buy. And then there is the reality... the mother with her little girl shivering in the cold on the street corner holding a sign begging for help, the family who has lost a loved one who can never imagine ever being happy for the holidays again, the mistreated little dog shivering in the rain. Do the rich, happy people on TV see what I see, or are they blind to the truth, too drunk with their fine wines and laughter to notice those less fortunate?

I often wonder why I even participate in the madness that is Christmas. Every year I spend more money than I have for a few moments of pleasure for the kids as they open their gifts. I worry and stress over how we are going to make ends meet until income tax return when we will be able to pay our credit cards down some.

There is one word that keeps me going through this time of year. It is Hope. Hope that next year will be a better year and I will be successful and more financially stable. Hope that the lady on the street corner will find a job and no longer be living in poverty. Hope that the family who lost their loved one will one day be able to laugh again, and the little dog will find a home where he is loved and well cared for. Hope that I can be a better person, giving more of myself instead of only expecting to receive from others.

When I see the TV people, I feel cheated, envious and poor. But when I see reality, I realize in my heart that I am blessed beyond measure. I have my health, a loving wife, and three fine young men for sons. I have a roof over my head and food in the refrigerator. I have a vehicle that works (for now) and a bus that stops just a couple of blocks down the road in case my van breaks down. I live in one of the most beautiful places on earth, right near the heart of the Redwood Forest and just a short distance from the mighty Pacific Ocean.

Is there really Peace on Earth? No, but I can choose peace for myself and an attitude of thankfulness.

So let the holidays come, let the bills pile up and let the cold winter winds blow. Me? I'm ready for Spring!