Grave Tidings

My sense of adventure has been working overtime in the last few weeks and I have started something new with my family. Each weekend we travel to a local spot and look for something different, something we haven't done before, a place we have never visited. I try to get the kids involved, but they usually prefer to stay home and play video games, so it invariably ends up being me and Patti going together.

Yesterday we went to the Victorian Village of Ferndale to do some shopping and sight seeing. Some of the scenes for the movies "Outbreak", "The Majestic", and the original "Salem's Lot" were filmed in Ferndale.

We looked around for a little bit and then came the moment I had been looking forward to. Ferndale has a cemetery situated on a hill at the end of town, and through all of the years that we have lived in California, I have never visited it. I did for the first time yesterday and have to say that I was amazed.

The cemetery is situated on a steep hill and goes up to several different levels. Just when you think you have reached the top, there is more up ahead. There are mausoleums, old graves from the 1800s, and enough history to whet the appetite of any adventure seeker.

It was around 11am when Patti and I arrived at the cemetery and the sun was rising over the trees at the top of the hill. A hawk cried and circled overhead and ravens came to rest on some of the tombstones. It was very quiet and peaceful. It seemed that the little town of Ferndale had decided to sleep in on this sunny Saturday morning.

I climbed up a couple of levels higher than Patti, taking stone stairs and admiring the view. From near the top of the cemetery you can see the entire Eel River Valley and can enjoy the view of the farmlands that stretch as far as the eye can see.

The gravestones and stairs were a dull gray, a stark contrast to the bright daffodils that were glowing in the rays of the morning sun. I took several pictures before Patti said that she was ready to head back.



Many people find graveyards to be morbid places, even scary. They are uncomfortable with the dead, and prefer to shut out the voices of the past. I am fascinated with cemeteries and am always respectful and make sure to leave everything the way it was before I came. The dead do not frighten me.

I have seen many graveyards in my lifetime but have to say that the Ferndale Cemetery is one of the most interesting and picturesque grounds I have ever visited. I didn't get to climb all the way to the top on this visit, but plan on visiting again. This time we will have to bring the kids.

The Problem With Reality

I work in a very fast paced environment. On a daily basis I face deadlines, problems and emails that I never seem to have time to deal with. I am constantly under a great deal of stress and have to watch my blood pressure. I realize that I'm no different than millions of other Americans when it comes to the reality of this disfunctional world that we have created.

I have my own way of dealing with being a casualty of Capitalism. It's called Escape! I have never been one to follow sports and could care less who wins the Super Bowl. I am not interested in Angelina Jolie's new hairstyle or who is the most popular star on American Idol.

I crave Fantasy! At every opportunity, I leave this mundane life and all of its problems and retreat into realms of magic and mystery. Sometimes the places I visit are beautiful and inhabited by wondrous creatures who are friendly and helfpul. Other paths take me down dark roads where I encounter the most fiendish of beasts and shadows from beyond the grave.


How do I reach these worlds of wonder? I love to read! I can usually be found reading at least two to three books at any given time. As a boy I enjoyed the Tarzan series by Edgar Rice Burroughs and have recently gone back and read them again.
Another lesser known character created by ERB is John Carter, Warlord of Mars. The adventures of John Carter and his love Dejah Thoris are some of the best Science Fiction novels I have read. Long before Star Trek, Star Wars or the Space Age itself, ERB was creating fantastical races and space ships on other planets.


Of course I have to mention my love for Tolkien and his Lord of the Rings Series, as well as The Chronicles of Narnia by CS Lewis. I have also read the Prydain Chronicles by Lloyd Alexander and the Merlin Trilogy by Mary Stewart. I finally read the Harry Potter series by JK Rowling in 2007 and was drawn into the world of Hogwarts, far away from the ordinary lives of Muggles.

Other books I have enjoyed are the Dragonlance Series created by Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman, and the morbid Ravenloft series set in a gothic world of Horror.

I have been a comic book fan since I was a child and have boxes filled to overflowing in storage. Some of my favorites are the X-Men, Justice League, Teen Titans, Wonder Woman and Elf Quest.

At other times I travel to worlds of wonder through film, including movies and TV series. I have recently discovered the Carnivale series that aired on HBO several years ago and am currently watching those, as well as the BBC series Primeval. In the past my favorite TV series were Xena: Warrior Princess and Hercules The Legendary Journeys.

I am looking forward with anticipation to seeing the remake of Clash of the Titans and also the new Harry Potter film scheduled to be released this summer. The technology continues to improve, delighting audiences with the most amazing films ever created. I have mentioned in a previous blog my fascination and love for the film Avatar.

Sadly, I don't attend Hogwarts, nor do I fight lions armed with only a dagger beside Tarzan of the Apes in the jungles of Africa. Xena isn't my mentor, teaching me how to wield a sword and defend myself against corporate invaders, and Gandalf and Aslan do not walk beside me, guiding me along my path with their words of wisdom. All of this is just make believe, and thus unreal. Or is it?

Why is fantasy so popular in our culture? Why do people stand in line, fighting crowds to see the newest Twilight Film? I don't see very many movies out there about life in the office. No, in the deepest depths of our being, we all crave something more. We know that there are deep and vital truths being portrayed in the lives of our heroes in books and on film. We are intrigued by the idea that they may not be quite so distant as we are led to believe.

What is it that makes something Real? Do you have to be able to see it or touch it for it to truly exist? What about love, hope, or even fear? We have all experienced these emotions, and yet they are intangible and cannot be measured by science or cold hard facts.

One of my favorite quotes is from the movie the Polar Express - "Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see." So Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus! And Frodo really did save Middle Earth by destroying the Ring of Doom. Faeries still dance under the light of the full moon and sometimes the dead come back to visit the living.


How do I know this to be true? I have seen it... with my heart.

Tomorrow I will go back to work, punch the time clock and face another day of problems at the office. But at the soonest opportunity, I will leave this world behind with all of its problems and once again travel to realms of mystery and magic. If only for awhile.

No Stranger to Darkness

I had a good week last week. Things are going much better at work, our income tax return came in on Saturday morning, and we took a trip up to Crescent City and Brookings, OR. I was able to have a little bit of spending money and we had a good time together as a family. Everything was going great when suddenly, without warning... it hit me!

I have suffered with bouts of depression for most of my adult life. It often comes immediately after a very happy and joyful experience. I can't seem to be able to control it, and I am not always sure what triggers it. Sometimes I think that it is genetic, as my brother and sister suffer in the same way. At other times I believe that it is just my way of coping with the inconsistencies of life.

To be honest, at times it becomes quite comfortable, like a blanket of darkness protecting me from the influence of the outside world. The sun seems to hide its face from me and the mists creep across the fields. In times like these I enjoy listening to dark music and prefer dreary days to light and warmth. Ravens seem to follow me wherever I go, their calls echoing in my ears. It is during these times that I really notice them and try to listen for their messages.

At other times the internal darkness is not quite so comfortable, becoming physically painful. This is what happened on Sunday. I can't quite put my finger on what caused it. Perhaps it was simply being reminded of a traumatic experience from my past, or being faced with my own apathy and cynicism. This is a terrible place to be and at such times I am usually plagued with tremendous self doubt and guilt. In times like these it becomes unbearable to be surrounded by people, hounded by their needs and petty complaints, and I prefer to be left alone. This is no time for joking and laughter. Silence is my friend.

I have learned to live with my Dark Side, even to embrace it. It is a part of me, just as sure as the part that loves sunshine and flowers in the spring. I am not afraid of my Dark Side, and have found inspiration and faith during these times spent in the shadows. I have discovered that most of my creativity flows from my Dark Side.
If given the choice, I would not banish my Dark Side. It keeps me balanced as I come face to face with the ugliness and hypocrisy inside of me. It shows me the truth, that I am not always the nice, polite person who I appear to be on the outside.

Many people face their own inner demons but are afraid to speak about it because they don't want to appear weak or even crazy. I have found that if you face the Darkness head on and learn to respect it, it can become a powerful ally.

Imbolc

Spring is in the air! Although we are at the beginning of the month of February, the trees here on the North Coast are already beginning to blossom. Daffodils are springing up from the rain soaked ground. The Aleutian Geese can be heard as they fly overhead on their migratory path.

Tuesday was Groundhog Day, and as predicted, the groundhog saw his shadow, foretelling six more weeks of winter. Although looked upon with amusement and jest, this day has a very interesting history. In fact, the groundhog seeing his shadow is an American tradition. A much earlier version from the Old World involved a snake!

I have always been an avid reader of Mythology, and more recently have found myself drawn to the myths of the ancient Celts. To these people of old, February 2 was a very special day known as Imbolc, or Ewe's Milk. It was at this time of year that the first signs of spring would appear, and the sheep would begin to lactate in anticipation of giving birth to their little lambs. This day was sacred to the Celtic Goddess Brigid, the Goddess of the Hearth, Smithcraft and Poetry. This Goddess was revered and honored throughout the Celtic lands and was known by many names. It was said that on the eve of Imbolc that Brigid would travel the world with her Faery Cow. The people who honored her would leave a libation of milk and sometimes food. They would also leave a green ribbon on their doorstep, hoping that Brigid would bless it during her travels and it would be used for healing throughout the year. Leaving milk and goodies on the eve of a holiday... hmmm... where have we heard that one before?

As Christianity became the dominant religion, those who followed the Old Ways were forced to change their traditions and rituals. But the people loved Brigid so much that they would not let her memory die. Along came St. Brigit, one of the most beloved saints of the people of Ireland. Brigit had miraculous powers to heal the sick, to bring dead animals back to life, and she was even said to be the foster mother of Jesus. There are many legends about the beloved saint and she was said to have built churches on the old sites where the Druids used to gather to worship. St. Brigit's holy day was called Candlemas, also celebrated on February 2.

The Caim of Bride was a charm or prayer that was recited to call upon the protection of Brigid.



The Caim of Bride


Be the compassing of Bride around me
Keeping me from ill and evil,
Keeping me from death and doom,
From malice and misfortune.
Be the fiery sword of Bride
Defending me from all black swarms.

Be the shield of blessed Bride
Protecting me from all sharp edges.
Be the cloak of gentle Bride
Encircling me.

Be the compassing of Bride around me,
Keeping me from hurt and harm,
Keeping me from wound and woe,
From darkness and despair.

Be the compassing of Bride around me
This day and every day,
This night and every night.

This is an obscure holiday but happens to be one of my favorites. Perhaps it is because if is completely devoid of commerciality. Most people who I come into contact with are clueless about the origins of this day.

No other figure builds the bridge between Christianity and Paganism like Brigid, or Bright Arrow as she was known to her devotees. Beloved Goddess, Blessed Saint, Brigid's flame continues to burn as we await the awakening of the Earth in the Spring.